I have been honest about the struggles in adapting to our new home, in job searching, in finding my place here, and in living and parenting alone. Even in these moments, I try to remember that life will balance out. Life is all about balance: good and bad, light and dark, beautiful and ugly, good and evil. For every negative comes a positive, even if it takes what feels like forever.
So I can share good news – finally! Because life is not only turning up but has sprouted new possibilities and events in spite of the difficulties. Every bad moment has a good one, and it feels like there have been plenty of good moments lately.
– I’m working – finally! I went on so many interviews, researched additional schooling and training, toyed with the idea of working ANY job, and sulked about my unemployment. I interviewed at the vet clinic on the joint base back in December, but I never heard anything back. I also took a substitute teacher course this summer with plans to do this until I could find the right job. Literally the day I finished the course, the clinic called and offered me the operations assistant (aka office manager) position. Crazy, right? I am back managing a vet clinic, and I love it. Even more ironically, I have had at least 10 calls for interviews at other offices since I accepted the position. All those months of waiting and worrying, and now I’m turning offers down. Life.
– the kids go back to school – finally! Every parent will agree with me – summer break is not fun. Yes, you plan activities and trips, and you take advantage of the time to sleep in, to spend time with your children, and to have less to rush off to. However, the lack of a schedule is boring for the kids. They end up climbing the walls and fraying your nerves. I know my kids need school, and I need it, too.
The girls are registered for school and ready! They will be in 8th, 4th, and 3rd grade – hard to believe. Leo has also started back at daycare, and he loves it. He was genuinely upset that had to leave the other day! His sitter is wonderful, flexible with me as I battle Honolulu traffic, and she even does school with the toddlers (as much as she can, lol). So I can rest easy and focus on work while they all are entertained with school, daycare, and friends.
– I bought a second car – finally! We knew that we would need to purchase a second vehicle for Andy, and I have been looking for months. We wanted to find something that would be large enough to fit most of us but also affordable, used but not super old, and something that both of us could drive and agree upon. Cars are expensive here, even when buying used. I have test driven and negotiated, but nothing was the right fit. But then, I found it – a 2012 Jeep Liberty with relatively low mileage and plenty of space.
The reason this is such an accomplishment is that I bought this car for Andy but by myself. I have never purchased anything this large without him – not because I cannot but because we like to make these decisions together. I sent him pictures, gave him details, and he gave me his trust. So we now have 2 vehicles again!
– I’m happy – finally! This sounds so misleading, as if I was unhappy before. I wasn’t, but I was not feeling like myself. I felt like I was unfulfilled or that I was just lost in the daily trials of motherhood, adulthood, and life. I have pulled myself up, taken what blessings I have, and remembered to be myself. I dyed my hair bright red again because that is me. I started doing the things I liked and have wanted to do. I make myself get up and out, because I never regret trying a new beach or exploring the library. I stopped trying to be “Hawaii Rachel” and remembered to be myself. And you know what? I’m happier being me, even if that does not fit into my new environment or the popular lifestyle here.
And finally….I’m writing more and more. I write here and for Military Moms Blog. I take the opportunity to share my passion in volunteering and in work. I’m fulfilled and enjoying doing what I love, which is all we ever want in life. I am actually writing this as a reminder to myself when I feel like life is too hard or never going to improve. This is physical and virtual proof that life always turns up – finally.