Day 116: Rachel, the person

Before I had met Andy and married him, I did not want children.  I really didn’t.  I loved being a part of a big family and loved children, but I just couldn’t imagine having my own.  I had goals and big dreams, I liked being able to sleep in and to take time to look nice, and to be fair, I was pretty young when I decided this.  But once I had my children, I made a few promises to myself.  I promised myself that I would get a college degree (I’m now working on my third!), that I would still make time for my husband (you take the date nights and the stolen moments during the day when you can), and that I would never fall into the “I’m a mom, I don’t have to look nice” trap.  I’ve had my days where I am barely functioning on little sleep, therefore applying mascara is not a priority.  I admit to making many trips to the store in my gym clothes, since my kids won’t let me shower at the gym.  But for the most part, I try to dress like myself, my real self, on a daily basis.

Today, I was able to dress nicely, not only for a school advisory board meeting, but for myself.  I love clothes and fashion, so attire is important to me.  I got to wear my favorite gray booties with a flouncy skirt, both of which I bought for a steal.  More importantly, when I can wear an outfit I like and can take the time to look nice, I feel better.  I feel more confident.  I feel attractive, which I admit I do not always feel about myself.  I feel like a person – not just a mom, a chauffeur, or an underpaid maid.  I feel like Rachel.  I think I remember her!

I will not always have days like today.  Unlike celebrities, I do not have a stylist, a makeup artist, or a trainer to kick my butt.  For us regular moms, it’s not always so easy to look or to feel beautiful.  Without coffee, I would not even look conscious.  Tomorrow you  might see me dragging my feet to a playgroup with a typical messy ponytail and my worn-out ballet flats.  You may catch me buying milk with a haggard expression and dragging a 2 year old behind me.  But today, I felt like myself.  And today, I kept the third promise I made in motherhood, all while juggling ballet, meetings, doctors, and the gym.  I’d call that a successful day in the life of this mother.  🙂 


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