I woke up this morning feeling like garbage – no, feeling like a piece of garbage that my dog Emma had picked back out of the garbage can, chewed apart, and spit back onto the rug. My throat was dry and itchy, my head hurt, I was exhausted from tossing and turning all night, and my body just ached. I knew that if I could get a day of rest, even a day of doing nothing but relaxing, that I would feel better. I’ve been waiting for this cold to finally kick in, so I knew that today was inevitable. I was awoken by the girls, who I kindly informed that I did not feel well and would like to spend the day quietly resting. I gave them breakfast, turned on some cartoons, and laid down on the couch with Addie.
Unfortunately, moms do not get sick days. It is ironic that the days where a mom needs quiet and peace are the days that her kids are the loudest and most obnoxious. I tried to entertain them with books, crafts, snacks, etc. but it’s hard to play with your children when all you want to do is crawl back into bed. Today, the girls wanted to run like banshees around our tiny hallways. They wanted to fight about every toy and object, ranging from a Monster Hill doll accessory to a Dora blanket. They fought me on everything, despite the fact that I simply asked for an easy day. Right now, they are pretending they are asleep in bed, even though I have to go back upstairs every ten minutes to threaten them with peril if they do not go to sleep. Alas, I did not get the rest I wanted and still feel like garbage.
Do not think that I blame my children in any way. Everyone gets sick, no matter how healthy they are. With all the snot, spit, poo, and human contact I encounter everyday, it would be a miracle if I did not contract the sniffles. The girls are feeling great, so it’s hard for them to want to take it easy. But when moms need to rest, especially when moms are alone, it does not happen. You are responsible for other people, no matter what day it is, what the weather is like, what you need to get done, or how you are feeling. It is one of those things that they did not tell you about becoming a mom but one of those things you learn quickly. You have to be strong, responsible, and resilient, even on your worst days. True, I could call someone to come get my children for even an hour so I could sleep or to help me, but I like to save those favors for times when I’m really sick (like Exorcist-style vomiting, burning fever, can’t-look-at-food sick). Besides, I became a mom, not always intentionally, and these demanding little people are mine. Even on the days when my head hurts and I yearn for a mute button for kids.
So I am going to finish this short blog, peek in on my sleeping children (optimism that they are truly asleep), and crawl back into my bed with some tissues, Vicks, and Friends on DVD to drift into sleep to.