Day 26-27: oh January, will you ever end?

It has been a long month.  After the first week of Andy being gone, I felt like the days were starting to go by faster.  But the end of the month is crawling by.  No matter how busy we are or what is going on, these days are just slow!  Maybe it is because we have so much going on, so I feel like my days are longer.  Maybe it is because I don’t sleep well, so all the days start to blend together into one really long day.  Whatever the reason, I would really like January to be over with.  That would make it one month down, and February is always a shorter month, then March comes, and we’re almost halfway there!  Don’t you love the optimism?

January has been a month of technology failures for me as well!  I had two DVD players break about a week after Andy left.  Then, my vacuum broke mid-cleaning last week, for no apparent reason (I think it is a blown fuse and luckily, it is a European vacuum so I just have to take it in to get looked at.  Waiting for the next paycheck to do that!).  Now, our Playstation that we use for movies has been shutting down for no reason at all.  We have been having some issues with it for about a month now, and it has just expired its warranty period, so I would not be surprised if it needs to be sent it.  Again, all of these things cost money, money I would rather be spending on fun things to do with the kids or for saving for when Andy gets back.  I have a love/hate relationship with all things technology, but who doesn’t?

I’ve been so frustrated with people and things that are not in my control.  Rational and logical Rachel knows that there is nothing I can do, so I should stop worrying about it and let things happen on their own.  Caring and concerned Rachel wants to do something, anything, to change things and help, even though I cannot.  It is driving me mad – literally mad and angry.  When you care about people, it’s difficult to watch them make mistakes and to potentially fall on their face.  I’m learning, especially as a mother, that sometimes this is the only thing you can do.  It does not matter what you say, any reasoning you have, or what you do.  Sometimes, people are just going to do what they are going to do, and you have to let things happen on their own.  It is easier said than done, but I am working on it.  I need some sleep anyways, so I have to stop worrying and fretting about things I cannot control!

In Andy news, he is doing okay and is mainly cold and frustrated.  Again, I do not like that he is frustrated, but I love that he hates it there.  I’m hoping he gets the package we mailed to him soon so I can get a better idea of how long mail is taking to get to him.  He misses us and everyone, and he wants everyone to know that he appreciates you writing; he also wants you to know that he is not the writer in the family (I am), so do not be offended if he never writes back!  He still loves hearing from everyone.

I am off for now.  No school for Anya today (teacher work day) but she is selling Girl Scout cookies here for an hour today.  I love cookie season!  Andy will be getting some in his next care package…yum!


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